That's Not Punny!!!

[infernalis]

i don't get it??????

The ups driver was the real father

[Snake lover 3-25]

oooooooo lol i figured it was like a machine that he hooked up to the guy to transfer the pain lol

[guidofatherof5]

It was a machine hooked up to the husband but it transfered pain from the wife to the father. Since the husband wasn't the real father the joke is the UPS driver was the real father and was killed by the pain They always say when you have to explain the joke it must not have been very funny. Sorry! I'll try to do better.
Did you hear the one about!!!

[Snake lover 3-25]

well lol it was funny once i got it

[infernalis]

When I die, I want to go quietly in my sleep as my father did,
Not screaming in horror like his passengers

[guidofatherof5]

A farmer wanted to get into pig farming so he purchased 3 sows. Of course, he need to get them bred and called his neighbor who had a boar. The neighbor told him to bring them up and drop them off in the field with the boar. After dropping them off he went to the neighbors house for some coffee. While at the house he asked how he would know if the process took. The neighbor told him after taking the sows home later he should check them in the morning. If they're rolling around in the grass the process took. If they're rolling around in the dirt it didn't. Next morning the farmer looked outside and saw the sows rolling around in the dirt. He called the neighbor and was told to drop them back off with the boar. He did so and after some coffee took his sows home once more. Next morning, they were rolling around in the dirt again. He dropped them back off with the boar and had some more coffee. The next morning the farmer had to be gone long before morning. Around dawn he called his wife and asked her to look outside to see what the sows were doing. He asked her whether they were rolling in the grass or in the dirt. The wife went and looked and returned to the phone. The impatient husband asked what they were doing? The wife said you won't believe it! Two of the sows are in the back of the pickup and the others honking the horn!

[ssssnakeluvr]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! love it!!!!

The Pope, a brilliant reporter, and a boy scout are on a plane. the plane developed engine trouble. the pilot came out and said the plane was going to crash and he had bad news....the plane only had 3 parachutes. he grabbed one and said that since he was the pilot he was required to report the crash to the authoriies and jumped out of the plane. the brilliant reporter said "this is big news!!! I gotta get this story to the editor!!" he grabbed one and jumped out of the plane. the Pope turned to the boy scout and said, "son, I have lived a full live and you still have your life ahead of you. you take the last parachute". teh boy scout turned to the Pope and said "no worries, the brilliant reporter took my backpack!"

[Stefan-A]

All seemed fine and the happy couple left the hospital with their new baby. They arrived home only to find the UPS driver dead in the driveway

How long had he been there?

[drache]

a traveling salesman is going along a curvy country road in the evening, when suddenly on a short uphill right bend he is being passed on the outside by a three-legged chicken
of course he thinks he's seeing things, since it's been a long day, but when he sees the chicken disappear into a farmyard ahead, he decides to inquire
so he knocks on the door and the farmer comes out and he asks him, a bit hesitantly "Sir, is it possible that I just saw a three-legged chicken turn into your farmyard?"
the farmer says "yup, we're breedin' them"
the salesman says "why on earth would you breed a three-legged chicken?" and the farmer explains: "you see, mister, we're a three person household, and we all like the drum sticks, so whenever we have chicken, either one of us doesn't get a leg, or we have to make two chickens"
"so those three-legged chickens . . . do they taste like regular chicken?" asks the salesman
the farmer says "beats me, ain't never been able to catch one"

[guidofatherof5]

Stefan, Probably shortly after the pain became too much for him. As far as the actual lenght of time he was there, I'm not sure. I don't think it has much bearing on the punch line. Of course, this is just my opinion and not based on any scientific data or analysis.