Meeting Jesus, The Story of JFC

[MoJo]

Great story! Thanks for the great laughs!

Joanna

[Stefan-A]

Has this story been posted on kingsnake.com? I could swear I've read it somewhere before.. It's still funny, though.

Why is it always Jesus? Why not ******* Muhammad or ******* Budha?

Neither of the alternatives have the same cultural relevance.

[ssssnakeluvr]

that was hilarious!!!! I love it!!!!

[Spiritwolf]

The name Jesus came because the guys were saying "Jesus ****ing Christ" when JC showed them she knew where a girl should aim an attack to get the guys attention the quickest. It was conveniently effective to tell them that Jesus ****ing Christ was the snake's name and also her attack command.

However I certainly wasn't going to use that as her real name. I'm sure you can imagine the ...hmmm....awkward situations that could arise, not to mention how using such a name might lower your reputation or impression in the eyes of other people that you AREN'T trying to intimidate! So I shortened it to JFC and then to JC.

Offhand I don't remember if I have posted the story on kingsnake.com yet or not. My other pc with all my account info (and a couple of other funny snake stories I wrote) crashed recently. The good news is that all my info is on a second HD so if I can't get the other pc running again, I can drop that drive into a different pc.

A funny incident related to this story occurred about two weeks later when I was in the woods and ran across some more weed smokers hiding out in the woods. One of them said to the others, "Be careful, there's the lady who has the attack trained poison snakes I was telling you about."
Two of those guys, including the one who made the comment, were in the group that first met JC.
Luckily nobody asked if I had JC in the bag or asked to see her, since I wasn't carrying her with me that day.
However, even though hilariously erroneous, and even though my gut instinct is that those guys were harmless, it might be beneficial to my safety in the woods (I would say that about 85 percent of the time, I don't encounter anyone else when I go to the woods) when I do run into people out there!

[Snake lover 3-25]

wow if i those guys had come up to me in the middle of the woods i would have run home screaming and called the cops!!!
you have a lot of courage!!!!!!
great story!!!

[Zigmund]

wow it was a great story

[Garter_Gertie]

GREAT story! Loved it! Kiss JFC for me!

[CrazyHedgehog]

very funny!

[infernalis]

And folks wonder why Dorothy and I get HOSTILE when we encounter strangers in our woods.

There are paths leading to town, and over the hill... we blocked them and guard the property well.

The idiots and 30 somethings trying to score on a teen have all fled and will likely not return anytime soon.

[Spiritwolf]

This is a photo (taken with a very crappy camera, I just got a new Canon yesterday so I now should be able to start taking GOOD pics!) of JC doing one of her favorite things, admiring her own reflection in the glass of her tank.

I wish I knew how old JC is, (hopefully she has a lot of time left to live and provide me with story material, and isn't getting old yet...)

*dekay...I empathize with you about problems with people going to the woods for questionable reasons. When I lived on a farm, the neighbor across the road finally cut down most of the woods on her farm because of deer hunters sneaking in the back of the woods, killing deer, and leaving the carcasses to rot. And any wooded area that was anywhere near the road, was a target dumping ground for unwanted animals. For people who think that if they dump animals near farms, that those animals will easily get a home on the farm...WRONG!
Dumped dogs especially, are very UNwelcome on farms. I had a big kennel of quality German Shepherds and the last thing I wanted was to have an unknown dog come onto the property, carrying who knows what diseases (other than canine distemper, which is very common in raccoons...luckily vaccines do an excellent job protecting dogs and pups from distemper. Everyone in the area I used to live in , just called the county to pick up any stray dogs that came around. There were few enough people living around there that dogs belonging to someone who lived there, were easy to recognize, and we would just corral the dog and call the owner who usually was out looking for their escapee.
It seems all wooded areas are seen by a certain kind of people, as a place to dump garbage, especially garbage involving big things which include some kind of metal that doesn't degrade. Mattresses are a common thing to find, and long after the material is gone, the springs, etc, continue to make a hazardous nasty mess in the woods. Mattress springs, bicycle wheel spokes, etc, are hazardous. Any kind of trash which holds water (old tires especially) are breeding heaven for mosquitoes! Trash RUINS the appearance of the woods, it's sooo UGLY to go down a trail lined with trees and wildflowers, and then turn the corner and see someone's old box springs and rusty refrigerator marring the sight.
Trash in the creeks also is hazardous in many ways, as well as extremely ugly. The creek in the woods here runs clear most of the time, but marring it's appearance is all sorts of nasty junk on the bottom, everything from car parts to broken glass bottles.
The woods also seems to provide the ideal place for people to hide while they are drinking their beer, smoking their dope, etc...(I usually wear a camo shirt and dark jeans and try to avoid being seen by such types in the woods, some of them are just plain CREEPY..) and leave their trash and beer bottles scattered all around. Kids also go into the woods, on their ATVs, bicycles, etc, and I remember once when I was digging earthworms for the snakes, telling a couple of kids what I was doing, and all 3 of us were made nervous by a drugged out creep that appeared...fortunately, the kids dad came back there and the creep departed...but that shows briefly how the drunks and doped up idiots present danger in more than one way.
Most of the time I don't run into the creeps because I try to go to the woods at times when they are least likely to be out there.
I will add that JC must have made a lasting impression on some of them because recently I was back there, and some guy appeared, said "Oh **** its the snake lady!" turned around, and left quickly!
Thank you JC!