That's Not Punny!!!

[brain]

My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
"No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started...ooohhhh

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?”
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"
And that's when the fight started...ooohhhh

[Charlet_2007]

This One's for you Dekay Brown lol..

Silly Computer Acronyms...

PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms

ISDN: It Still Does Nothing

APPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity

SCSI: System Can't See It

DOS: Defective Operating System

BASIC: Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control

IBM: I Blame Microsoft

DEC: Do Expect Cuts

CD-ROM: Consumer Device - Rendered Obsolete in Months

OS/2: Obsolete Soon, Too.

WWW: World Wide Wait

MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs

PENTIUM: Produces Erroneous Numbers Thru Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics

AMIGA: A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction

LISP: Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parentheses

MIPS: Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed

WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System

MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers

RISC: Reduced Into Silly Code

[adamanteus]

CD-ROM: Consumer Device - Rendered Obsolete in Months

I like this one, so true of many things these days.

[Stefan-A]

DOS: Defective Operating System

CD-ROM: Consumer Device - Rendered Obsolete in Months

Now those two aren't really fair. The DOS most commonly used was pretty non-defective and it took a decade to render CD-ROM obsolete. Nothing compared to floppy disks, though, they've been with us since 1984.

[adamanteus]

Now those two aren't really fair.

It's not meant to be fair Stefan, it's meant to be fun!

[Stefan-A]

It's not meant to be fair Stefan, it's meant to be fun!

Yeah, but it's only funny if it's true.

[adamanteus]

The one I've always liked is a genuine one...... TWAIN.

[Charlet_2007]

Signs, Signs, Everywhere a Sign...

In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

On an electrician's truck, "Let us remove your shorts."

On a front door, "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog."

On a butcher's window, "Let me meat your needs."

Outside a muffler shop, "No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming."

In a Beauty Shop, "Dye now!"

On the side of a garbage truck, "We've got what it takes to take what you've got." (Burglars please copy.)

In a restaurant window, "Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up."

Inside a bowling alley, "Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop."

[NikkiSixx]

This One's for you Dekay Brown lol..

Silly Computer Acronyms...



MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers

That wasn't very funny!!!

[count dewclaw]

Signs, Signs, Everywhere a Sign...

On a turf farm truck..."Instant grassification"