Cuisiart Brumator?

[guidofatherof5]

Well, I've had a little time on my hands and with the help of the good folks at "Cuisinart" I was able to design a simple yet effective device to tackle that ever nagging problem of Brumation. Now, for the first time offered a professional Brumator. With 8, yes I said 8 preset temps. Taking the guess work out of Brumation. Brumation is as simple as opening and closing a door. With its Brushed Stainless look and its elegant lines. The Cuisinart Professional Series Brumator will make you the envy of all your friends. Made for the discerning Thamnophis fan this device is at home in the family Herp. room or in the livingroom. It is also equiped so that you can set your own temp. zones. Now that's versatility! Call now and receive free shipping. Call in the next 10 minutes and we'll double your order. You heard me right, call in the next 10 minutes and you'll receive 2 for the price of one. Simply pay the shipping and handling fees.
Thanks for looking. Hope you enjoy my little endeavor. Of course, this was just for fun

[Lori P]

ROFL!!!! Brilliant!! But wait-- if I order now, will you include a set of Ginsu knives and an ab-lounger as well??? And are the snakes included???

[Garter_Gertie]

BUT WAIT! That's NOT ALL! If you call in the next ten minutes shipping is free!

Ignore. This was already stated. DOH!

[ssssnakeluvr]

LOL!!!! funny!!!!

[prattypus]

ugh. what a way to limit the joys that I have, both here, and on QVC- can anyone say SHAMWOW??

[infernalis]

Since we are all having some fun here...

Ever wonder about those TV ads that make statements like "Act now and we will include absolutely free of charge this wonderful bonus item, just pay the additional shipping and handling"

Since the phone numbers are toll free, try this it's fun...

Call them up and pretend like you want to order from them, but ask if you can pass on the "free" bonus item.

Tell them you have no interest and ask if they can "remove" that "extra" shipping and handling charge.

You may be surprised by the answer....

Of course, if I tell you what they say, the fun of doing it yourself would be gone.

[adamanteus]

"Sandstrom ontv cured me of my pogonophobia.....now, where can I get one of those fabulous spray-on beards?"

[infernalis]

Symptoms of Pogonophobia - Fear of beards:
breathlessness, excessive sweating, nausea, dry mouth, feeling sick, heart palpitations, inability to speak or think clearly, a fear of dying, becoming mad or losing control, a sensation of detachment from reality or a full blown anxiety attack.

There is a Way Out
Imagine what your life will be like when you know that you are not "defective". When you can be confident and at ease in situations where you used to feel your phobia. And when you can talk about your former fear symptoms as though you are describing a movie where the character is someone else, not you.

But wait, Act now and recieve totaly free your choice of 2 additional phobias, Just pay shipping and handling

[adamanteus]

Chucks' smile lacked sincerity.... because the other thumb was still stuck firmly up his arse.

[infernalis]

I thought that would make his smile bigger?